


shiver, shiver

by ghostbeer



Series: between two lungs [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bottom Bucky Barnes, Enthusiastic Consent, First Time, I swear there is actually like a little plot in here, M/M, Porn with Feelings, They just also bone down!!!, Top Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-03 09:32:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16323698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostbeer/pseuds/ghostbeer
Summary: “To answer your earlier question, I have seen a cock before, I just wasn’t expecting that to be the way I first saw yours.”Bucky shivered a little bit against Steve’s light touch. “Oh yeah?” he cooed quietly. “You been thinkin’ a lot about that, Rogers?”“To be honest, yeah,” he breathed, daring to bring his face within inches of Bucky’s exposed midsection. He brushed his lips lightly on Bucky’s stomach and was delighted to hear Bucky draw in a quick, sharp breath in response. Feeling bold, Steve continued, his lips brushing against Bucky’s damp skin as he spoke, “I’ve wanted to fuck you for a long time, Buck, just thought maybe you didn’t want to, or something.”--Or, Steve is a little self conscious about why he and Bucky haven't done the deed yet.....(and then they, you know, do the deed.)





	shiver, shiver

**Author's Note:**

> this is *technically* part of a series in that I wrote it to take place in the same canon-adjacent universe as give a gift for your behavior, the previous work, but it definitely stands alone! (it's porn....so, you know.)

Steve’s lungs were frustratingly full. He pumped his arms and legs harder, faster, pushing himself, or at least trying to. His goddamn Super Soldier body was not cooperating with his grand plan. He thought if he could barely catch his breath from a long, arduous run, then he definitely wouldn’t have space in his brain to worry. But no matter how fast he forced himself to go across the grounds of HQ, the thoughts still nipped at the back of his mind. The huffing and puffing he hoped would distract him never came, and his mind, unencumbered, wandered back to Bucky, off on his first solo mission.

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t a solo mission. Nat and Clint were physically with him, and Sam and Wanda were stationed nearby on recon. When Steve had insisted that he tag along, Natasha had given him a less-than-kind talking to about “sticking his nose in things” and “letting go once in a blue moon” and “being about 100 times less stealthy than everyone else because of that big, dumb Dorito body.” The logical part of Steve’s mind told him that four teammates around him flatly disqualified it from being a solo mission, but that wasn’t how it felt. It was Bucky’s first mission without Steve, and he felt incredibly unnerved about it.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Bucky to be able to handle himself—or any of the rest of the team to watch his back—it’s just that he wasn’t there to keep an eye on him, and that made him crazy. You can only lose a guy so many times before you started getting nervous letting him out of your sight. The thoughts of what might be happening to Bucky, what might have already happened to him, on the weeklong mission pounded in Steve’s head.

Frustrated by the persistent intrusion of these thoughts and his body’s inability to be overwhelmed, Steve shoved his hands in his sweatshirt pocket and ripped out some headphones. Without missing a step, he shoved them in his ears and picked a playlist Sam had made for him. He cranked the volume on his phone and, to his delight, found his thoughts drowned out by booming vocals, jazzy horns, and chaotic piano. He didn’t spend a lot of time taking Sam’s musical recommendations seriously, but he had to admit this set of songs was working for him, keeping him focused on each beat as he matched his footfalls to their pace.

He ran like that, head full of music and legs pumping eagerly, until the sun fell far past the treeline and a chill—well, the superhuman body temperature regulation version of a chill— began to work into his body.

He returned to the compound, sliding in through the door nearest the kitchen, welcoming the blast of heated air that hit his skin as he stepped inside. He kept Sam’s playlist blaring in his ears as he made himself a cup of coffee and stripped out of his sweaty hoodie and undershirt, which were sticking to his back unpleasantly. He was on day five of being totally alone at HQ, so he was becoming comfortable with seminudity in its communal spaces.

He ambled up the stairs carefully, trying not to spill any of the steaming hot coffee on his exposed skin. Bobbing his head a bit to Sam’s playlist, Steve sipped his drink as he entered his bedroom. He decided to grab his sketchbook to keep his mind occupied further. His own reflection in the small mirror on his desk stopped him as he reached into his drawer to grab his supplies. He was halted by the sight of a small red mark on his chest. The mark itself wasn’t too surprising—he remembered very vividly Bucky eagerly nipping at the skin there before he left—Steve was just surprised by its staying power.

He let his memory wander back to the evening Bucky had given it to him. “Wanna leave you with something to remember me by,” Bucky had almost growled against his skin. Steve had tried to groan at Bucky making fun of his concern for his safety on the mission, which he had confessed earlier that evening, but it came out as a sound much closer to pleasure. Bucky bit and sucked at the flesh of Steve’s chest, making sure to go low enough that it wouldn’t be visible when Steve had a shirt on. They had only admitted their feelings to each other a few weeks prior, and neither of them wanted the rest of the team to find out yet; they wanted to live in the bubble of it for a little while.

Things had stayed heated like that for quite a while, hands and mouths roving each other’s skin on Steve’s bed as Steve tried to pull all his feelings of worry behind his kisses. But just when Steve started to feel his need for Bucky grow desperate and arousal grow in his midsection, Bucky pulled back. “Gotta let me go to bed, Rogers. I’ve got an early wake-up call tomorrow for a very dangerous mission, or did you forget?” He smirked at Steve, then kissed his face a few more times chastely, ending with an uncharacteristically cute peck on Steve’s nose. Steve tried hard not to let his visceral disappointment show on his face and tenderly kissed Bucky back.

“Alright, alright, if you have to,” Steve said, hiding real disappointment in a playful tone. To his even greater chagrin, Bucky pecked him quickly and then rolled out of his bed, apparently not even intending to sleep next to Steve. “G’night. See you in a week. Don’t worry about me too much, okay? I’ll be fine.” he had said. Steve had made a vague noise of assent as Bucky flipped Steve’s light off, shut his bedroom door, and slipped into his own bedroom next door. Steve, deprived of Bucky’s hands and warmth next to him in bed, had slept unrestfully and regretfully alone that evening.

It hadn’t been the first time Steve felt frustrated by the limits of his contact with Bucky. In fact, Steve’s been aching to touch Bucky, to have Bucky touch him, since they bumbled through confessing their feelings to each other and Steve dared to gingerly kiss him. Something in him unlocked the moment his lips were finally on Bucky’s, and he found himself wanting to find out what the rest of Bucky tasted like, too. But every time things seemed like they were heading that way, Bucky would pull back. Steve was worried about pressuring him, so he never brought it up, but he was starting to feel crazed every time Bucky even looked at him. He felt like a teenager again, frustratedly finishing himself off in his bed night after night. He was happy to wait for Bucky—he’d wait for him forever, to be honest—but he was starting to wonder if there was something about him that Bucky didn’t want.

He ran a thumb over his hickey in the mirror, admiring the physical affection he had managed to get from Bucky. He then grabbed his sketching supplies and turned the volume on his headphones even louder, trying to push the thoughts of Bucky from his mind before they turned into worry. Heavy drums pounded in his ears as he shuffled out of his bedroom. Balancing his coffee, sketchbook, and writing utensils precariously in one arm, he opened Bucky’s bedroom door. He rolled his eyes when he realized Bucky left his light on while he was gone. Even though HQ ran on self-sustaining renewable energy sources, Steve couldn’t shake his Depression Era sensibilities about using as little power as possible.

He settled comfortably on the end of Bucky’s bed, which was unmade as usual, maroon comforter untucked completely in a way that Steve found both unfathomable and charmingly Bucky. He flipped open his sketchbook to the page where he had begun work on a sketch of the pile of vintage luggage Bucky had amassed from his zealous online vintage shopping habit. Steve liked the messy but artful way Bucky had stacked them. Messy but artful—that was the essence of Bucky Barnes.

Soon, Steve found himself in that almost trancelike state he loved about drawing, aided this time by the pulsing of Sam’s playlist in his ears. His drawing was coming together nicely and surprisingly quickly for his usual pace. He even decided to switch from pencil to the nice pen set Wanda had gotten him for his birthday. He held his pencil in his teeth as he opened the pens’ box, but he nearly swallowed it when something moved in the corner of his vision.

He whipped his head around to face the movement, suddenly on guard and aware of how alone he was. But his anxiety turned to plain shock when he realized the movement was the opening of Bucky’s bathroom door and a fully naked, wet Bucky Barnes emerging from it. Bucky’s head was covered as he rubbed a towel vigorously through his hair, and Steve was glad of that because it gave him time to shut his jaw that had automatically dropped and take a furtive look, feeling dirty but hungry to see the parts of Bucky he had been thinking about so obsessively. (He was glad to see everything lived up to his imagination.)

Before he let himself gawk too long, Steve quickly ripped out his headphones, turned his head to face the wall in front of him, and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Uhh, Buck…” he started to say before Bucky gave a small shout from his bathroom doorway.

“Holy shit!” Bucky yelped, and despite himself, Steve snuck a quick glance and saw Bucky quickly whip the towel off his head and in front of his crotch.

“Sorry, Buck!” Steve half-shouted quickly. “I, uhh, just came in to sketch your luggage and I had headphones in and music up really loud so I couldn’t hear anything and anyway, you were supposed to be gone for two more days! Shit, sorry, sorry, sorry!” Steve tripped over every other word and felt heat rise to his face that he suspected was unrelated to the humid heat that had poured out of Bucky’s bathroom. He knew his eyes had to be comically large, but his heart was still pounding too fast in his chest from the completely unexpected sight of a stark naked Bucky.

From just out of his periphery, Steve heard Bucky start laughing. “You don’t have to apologize so much, man,” Bucky said between chuckles. “You just scared the shit out of me, that’s all. And by the look on your face, guess I scared you, too,” Bucky quipped as he stepped across the room to stand directly in front of Steve, who was both relieved and disappointed to see he had secured his towel around his hips. “What, you’ve never seen a dick before?” he said, peering at Steve, seated on the bed, with a mischievous glint in his eye.

Steve shook the shock from his brain, dropped his sketchbook on the floor, and rolled his eyes. “I had no idea you were home! Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back?”

Bucky smiled at him sheepishly and said, “Thought it would be fun to surprise you, I guess.” He shrugged, and Steve felt his heart swell. “The mission went way quicker than expected, probably because we didn’t have your dead weight dragging us down,” Bucky continued, winking as he mocked Steve, who huffed in response. “Nat and Clint invited the rest of us to Clint’s place for a celebratory few days off, but I had them drop me here. By the way, the way Nat and Wanda looked at each other when I asked them to bring me here tells me there’s not really a point in tiptoeing around anymore.” Bucky pulled an annoyed face at the memory, and Steve chuckled to himself; he should have known better than to try to keep something a secret from Natasha.

“When I got back I was all ready to surprise you with my delightful presence,” Bucky said, smirking, “but you were nowhere to be found. So I hopped in the shower to wash off the filth of five days spent next to Barton.” He mouthed gagging and Steve laughed.

“I must have been out on my run when you got back, but I can’t say I’m sorry to have missed the Barton stink,” he said, and Bucky threw back his head in a laugh. Steve reached out and placed a hand on one of Bucky’s towel-clad hips. “I’m glad you’re back safe, Buck,” he said, squeezing Bucky’s hip for emphasis. “I was getting really worried, and please don’t give me shit about that tonight,” he said, a shy smile on his lips.

Bucky’s face softened, and he placed a hand on Steve’s cheek. “Alright, I won’t give you shit,” he said quietly. “Am I allowed to say that you worrying about me makes me want to kiss the fuck out of you?”

Steve smirked and said, “I’ll allow it,” before he pulled Bucky toward him. Bucky’s shins bumped the end of the bed between Steve’s legs, and he leaned down to kiss him deeply. Steve’s head was swimming with affection and heavy lust by the time Bucky pulled away and placed a small chaste kiss on Steve’s forehead. Before he could stop himself, Steve let out a low whine, and Bucky laughed quietly at him, placing two more pecks on Steve’s cheeks.

Steve dropped his hand from Bucky’s hip and began running his fingertips lightly up and down Bucky’s calf. When he spoke, his voice was low and gravelly. “To answer your earlier question, I have seen a cock before, I just wasn’t expecting that to be the way I first saw yours.”

Bucky shivered a little bit against Steve’s light touch. “Oh yeah?” he cooed quietly. “You been thinkin’ a lot about that, Rogers?” Bucky ran a hand through Steve’s hair, and Steve felt anticipatory goosebumps sprout on his skin. The tension was pooling in his body, and Steve knew he wouldn’t be able contain it this time. The combination of his relief at Bucky’s safe return, Bucky’s warm and wet skin, and his glimpse of what was underneath that goddamn towel had sent all of his usual careful restraint out the window.

“To be honest, yeah,” he breathed, daring to bring his face within inches of Bucky’s exposed midsection. He brushed his lips lightly on Bucky’s stomach and was delighted to hear Bucky draw in a quick, sharp breath in response. Feeling bold, Steve continued, his lips brushing against Bucky’s damp skin as he spoke, “I’ve wanted to fuck you for a long time, Buck, just thought maybe you didn’t want to, or something.” He muttered the tail end of his sentence, powering through his embarrassment by focusing on trailing kisses along the line where Bucky’s skin met his towel.

Bucky froze, and Steve avoided his gaze, ears burning. “Aw, Stevie,” Bucky breathed. He tugged gingerly on the back of Steve’s hair, but Steve stayed put. “Look at me, will ya?” he said. Steve reluctantly leaned back and met Bucky’s gaze, which was soft, an apology lingering there. Bucky leaned forward and kissed him delicately and then pulled back, placing a hand on his face and running his thumb along his cheek. “Of course I want you to fuck me,” he said with a grin.

Steve was stunned. He managed to stutter out “Then, uhh, I mean, why haven’t I?” with wide eyes while Bucky continued caressing his cheek.

Bucky smirked a little at his wide-eyed response. “I just didn’t want to rush anything, I guess,” he said, smirk faltering. “This is all so new for me, ya know?” He sighed almost imperceptibly. “I’ve barely been myself again after all that shit I went through. It’s been weird enough to transition from having no control over myself to, like, just living a day on my own terms. And then I had to get used to being around you again and everything that came with that—”

Steve took in a sharp breath, and Bucky began again quickly “Oh my god, no, not in a bad way at all!” he said, apology on his face. “You being back in my life is a fuckin’ gift, you know that. But just seeing you every day meant my whole life was laid out in front of me all the time. At least it was in a good-lookin’ package, I guess,” he said. This cracked through Steve’s confusion, and he smiled and turned his head to place a kiss in Bucky’s palm.

“And then, just when I was getting used to you being there again, I realized pretty quickly that I wanted to know what your mouth tasted like,” he continued with a sly grin. “Well, not just your mouth.” He smirked as Steve choked a little, surprised by the sudden lewdness. “I just, I dunno, didn’t want to move it all too fast. It’s weird being me, ya know. Hard to pinpoint what’s going on in my brain, what version of myself I’m going to feel like today,” he said, suddenly serious. Steve nuzzled into his hand like a cat to show his understanding.

Bucky continued, “You ground me, Steve—help me make sense of what’s real and what’s a ghost. Lookin’ at you makes me more sure of who I am at my core, ya know? I just didn’t want to complicate things quickly with, you know, fucking. Guess I’m scared of something getting weird or hard and losing my blond anchor point,” he said, voice cracking a little. Bucky dropped his eyes from Steve’s, avoiding his gaze.

Steve exhaled pointedly, the corners of his eyes swimming a little from the tender things Bucky admitted. Without thinking, he pulled on Bucky’s arm slowly but forcefully, catching his weight easily as Bucky fell into his lap. Wrapping one arm around Bucky’s waist, he reached up with his free hand and pulled his face to his with his hand cupped on the back of his neck. He kissed him deep and slow, full of gratitude and deep-in-his-bones affection. The pools in the corners of his eyes spilled over into two matching tears, which Bucky wiped away without breaking the kiss. As Bucky shifted a bit on his lap, he felt himself begin to get hard.

He pulled back from the kiss almost regretfully, and he had to physically restrain Bucky from chasing his mouth for more. “Buck, hang on a sec,” he said, a grin growing on his face.

“Don’t wanna,” Bucky said, struggling against the hand Steve had placed on his chin to pull it away. Steve chuckled but didn’t let up his grip.

“Look, you got to say your piece, lemme have mine for a second,” he scolded, and Bucky obliged with a groan and a small grimace. Steve smirked and shook his head. “I don’t wanna rush you at all, and I can wait as long as you want, I swear,” he said, in his best Boy Scout voice. “But, I mean, you don’t need to worry about losing me—ever,” he breathed, eye contact heavy between them. “You’re it for me. I’m old enough now to know I’m never gonna feel differently about you. And even if you change your mind about the, uhh, sexy part of it,” he said, wincing a little at the thought, “I’m still going to be there, in your life. You’re not going to get rid of me that easily.” He smiled again as Bucky rolled his eyes. “And, besides,” he said, inching his face toward Bucky’s, “I don’t know if you can really call 70 years ‘too fast’.”

Their lips met hungrily, and in a moment Bucky had turned his entire body to straddle Steve’s hips. Through the lustful haze that had filled his brain, Steve realized that Bucky’s towel had come undone around his waist. He pulled back from their kiss slightly and lightly grabbed the hem of it that was still flush with Bucky’s back. “Can I?” he asked quietly, and Bucky smiled and nodded. Steve pulled the towel away quickly, hungry to take a look at all of Bucky.

Steve’s sharp intake of breath at the sight of Bucky fully naked made a laugh bubble in Bucky’s throat. “So is this how you imagined seeing me for the first time?” he teased, leaning back slightly and preening even as he still straddled Steve. His cock was mostly hard, and, god, Steve already wanted to taste it.

“Something like this, yeah,” Steve said, and before Bucky could respond, Steve tightened his grip around his waist and flipped them dramatically, landing Bucky safely on his back on the center of his bed. Bucky made a small surprised noise, and Steve felt a little smug. He sat himself up on his knees, which were straddling Bucky’s, and took a few long, sweeping glances at Bucky’s body, greedy now that he was finally getting the chance to fawn. His cock twitched in his loose running shorts as he took in the hard muscle that covered every inch of Bucky, the skin still glowing with moisture from the shower, the line of neat dark hair that trailed down his abdomen to his cock. “God, you’re gorgeous,” Steve crooned.

Bucky rolled his eyes and said, “Get down here, Rogers.” He sat up and little and met Steve halfway as he came tumbling down on top of him. Steve ran his tongue along Bucky’s bottom lip, deepening the kiss. Bucky moaned, and the sound sent another twitch to his cock. Steve ground his hips on top of Bucky’s, pushing his aching bulge against Bucky’s hardened cock, and Bucky moaned again. Blood pounded in Steve’s ears and he was worried he was going to be driven completely out of his head by the wave of need for Bucky that washed over him.

He slowed their kisses for a moment and searched Bucky’s face, which was open and panting. “We don’t have to—” he began, but Bucky thrust his hips upward to push himself against Steve and it knocked the words out of Steve’s head.

“Not holding back this time, pal,” Bucky nearly purred. “I’m not letting you leave this room until you’ve fucked me senseless,” he said, lust glinting in his eyes, “and even then, it’d be better if you stayed. I’m kind of a cuddler.”

On another day, Steve might have laughed at Bucky’s little joke, but hearing him ask to be fucked senseless did something to his brain. He crashed his mouth against Bucky’s, parting his lips to let Bucky’s tongue explore it. His hand swept down Bucky’s side, and he shifted his body off Bucky’s slightly so he could greedily grab Bucky’s cock. It was warm and heavy in his hand, and he was pleased as Bucky yelped a little into his kiss when his fingers made contact. He tugged gently, not wanting the pent up tension between them to make either of them finish too soon.

Bucky groaned into Steve’s mouth and started wildly pawing at Steve’s waistband. Steve laughed. “Can I help you?” he purred as he moved to kiss the tender skin of Bucky’s neck and continued twisting his cock in his hand.

“Take your fucking pants off,” Bucky said, commanding tone undercut by the shudder that rippled through him as Steve nibbled on his earlobe.

Steve smirked a little against Bucky’s skin before he began sucking at the skin underneath his jaw. “Say please,” he breathed, feeling a little daring.

“Excuse me?” Bucky said, feigning offense at Steve’s sudden bossiness.

“I said,” Steve began, before pausing, bringing the hand that had been working Bucky slowly up to his face, spitting crudely into it, and replacing it on Bucky’s impatient cock, smearing his spit all over Bucky’s skin before starting to work him again, “say—please.” He punctuated both words with emphatic twists of his hand, and Bucky moaned the loudest he had yet.

“P-please,” he shuddered into Steve’s mouth, his whole body quivering lightly with pleasure.

Steve grinned. “Well, since you asked so nicely,” he said, leaving one last open-mouthed kiss on Bucky’s neck before rolling deftly onto his back beside Bucky and wrenching off his shorts, freeing his hard cock.

Bucky, sitting up a little on his elbows and eyeing him greedily, gave a playful low whistle. “I may be gorgeous, but you’re not half bad yourself,” he teased. Steve rolled his eyes and threw himself back on top of Bucky, not wanting to wait one more second for their skin to touch again. Their mouths met, wild and wanting. His hand found its way back to Bucky’s cock, still slick with his own spit. One of Bucky’s hands had found his nipple and the way his fingers were toying with it was driving Steve wild with need.

“Scoot up for me, baby,” he said, pulling back from the kiss to stare into Bucky’s light eyes. It was the first time he’d ever called him a pet name like that, and he liked the way Bucky’s eyes lit up when he heard it; he filed that fact away for later use. Bucky obliged, moving so that his head was on the pillows splayed around the head of his bed. Steve, however, stayed relatively put, head level with Bucky’s crotch. He licked his lips a little involuntarily as he ogled Bucky’s cock, leaking a little precum already, and heard Bucky snort from above him. “Something funny?” Steve asked, cocking his head defiantly.

Bucky, top half propped up a bit by his pillows, grinned down at him. “You just licked your lips like a hungry cartoon, that’s all,” he said, still smiling.

Steve laughed a little. “Yeah, well, maybe I am a little hungry,” he purred, drawing his face close to Bucky’s pelvis. Bucky drew in a sharp breath when Steve wrapped his hand around the base of his cock and pulled his mouth achingly close to the head. “I’ve been thinking a lot about the first time I would get to do this, too,” he said, sure that Bucky could feel his warm breath on his sensitive head. Bucky let out another small moan, this one a little desperate. Steve locked eyes with him and said “Can I?”

Bucky groaned out a tiny “Please…” and Steve couldn’t wait any longer. Slowly but purposefully, he licked along the underside of Bucky’s shaft, then placed his whole mouth over his head and swirled his tongue. If Steve weren’t already rock hard, the noises Bucky made when his mouth finally touched him would have been enough to get him there all on their own; Steve liked the way Bucky’s noises were half of a curse word and half of a full-on moan.

He bobbed his head gingerly, taking Bucky’s length into his mouth bit by bit. He’d never been on this end of a blowjob before, but he knew what he liked, so he decided he’d go with that. Bucky’s hands tangled in his hair, and Steve liked how they seized whenever he went a bit lower than before. Eventually, he worked his mouth down all of Bucky’s length, eyes watering as he fought his gag reflex, but it was worth it for the “Fuckshit oh my goooood” it got out of Bucky.

He continued, alternating bobbing, using his hand, and licking the delicate underside of Bucky’s cock, hoping mostly that he was making Bucky feel how much he was enjoying doing it. He used Bucky’s moans as a guideline, learning quickly that the more profane they were, the more Bucky liked something. Steve recognized Bucky’s tension building and started working even harder, pleased with himself that he was going to be able to pull Bucky over the edge with his mouth. But just as he thought it was imminent, he felt Bucky tug on his hair and manage to wheeze out, “Wait, hang on, no…”

Steve paused, pulling his mouth off Bucky’s length, but continuing to place kisses up and down his shaft. “Hang on why?” he said, daring to swirl his tongue around Bucky’s head.

Bucky moaned a little, but pulled Steve’s hair backward again. “Don’t wanna come yet, Stevie. Just getting started,” he panted. Steve let out a little disappointed groan, but obliged, but not before licking one last stripe along the underside of Bucky’s cock, causing Bucky to sort of yelp and pull Steve’s hair out of annoyance. Steve laughed and crawled up to Bucky’s mouth to kiss him in apology, which was apparently welcome.

They kissed deeply for a while, bodies intertwined. Bucky began kissing and licking Steve’s neck and then he started to laugh quietly to himself. “What could possibly be funny now?” Steve asked, feigning exasperation.

Bucky kissed Steve’s neck lightly between each word. “Your—neck—tastes—salty—” he said, still laughing quietly.

Steve felt himself blush. “Oh, shit. I’m sorry, I got pretty sweaty earlier. I would’ve showered off if I had any idea you were gonna be home and, ya know, licking me,” he said, shuddering as Bucky licked his neck again as if on command.

“No, it’s okay,” Bucky said into the crook of Steve’s neck, where he was biting lightly, “I kind of like it. You look good when you’re sweating.” His voice went low and hoarse. “Bet I can get you sweating again.”

Steve let out a kind of grunt he hadn’t heard himself make before, deep and almost animal. He pulled Bucky’s face back up to his and kissed him hard, finishing with a slightly hard bite on his bottom lip, which Bucky moaned into. “Stay here,” Steve nearly barked at him before shuffling himself below Bucky, hands trailing his skin as he went. He stopped with his head between Bucky’s legs, hovering over his reddened cock.

“Stevie,” Bucky breathed, “if you put your mouth on my cock again I’m gonna come, and I really don’t want to yet.”

Steve smirked up at him. “Well it’s a good thing I wasn’t going for that, huh?” he said, eyes twinkling. He slid his hands under Bucky’s hard thighs and gripped a little. Bucky, understanding flashing in his eyes, shivered in Steve’s hands. Before he moved again Steve asked, “Do you want me to?” but Bucky was already saying “Fuck, please, Steve,” before he could finish his question.

He gingerly pushed Bucky’s knees towards his chest, folding him into himself to open him up. Bucky gave another one of his curse-moans, and Steve began his hungry work. He licked one long stripe up Bucky’s hole and taint, taking in Bucky’s taste. He was surprised with how slick it was under his tongue, and he realized he wasn’t tasting Bucky at all, but something that was suspiciously like lube. He cocked his head a little and looked up quizzically at Bucky, who was smirking despite being nearly folded in half.

“You were nowhere to be found when I got back, so I had some fun in the bathroom. Sue me,” he said, winking.

Steve laughed, but it came out like a low grumble because his mind wandered to the image of Bucky opening himself up while he sat sketching, unaware, just outside the door. He lapped happily at Bucky’s hole, which was already looser than he expected from Bucky’s apparent solo session. Again, he was figuring out this particular act as he went, but he liked the noise Bucky made when he stuck his tongue all the way inside him, so he did it a few more times, trying to focus on his task and not the smile that was burning to blossom on his face, happy with his efforts.

Soon Bucky was practically panting. “I want you, Stevie,” he said breathily. “Want you inside me.”

Steve knew he was leaking a little already underneath his body, and Bucky’s words sent a jolt right to his cock. “Okay, baby,” he practically cooed. Bucky moaned at the nickname. Steve pulled his face up and adjusted his grip on Bucky’s legs, letting go of one of them and wrapping up the other in one arm. He licked a quick little stripe on Bucky’s hard cock and ducked a pillow Bucky chucked at him in response. Laughing quietly, he put his index finger in his mouth, wetting it. Bucky’s eyes glinted as he watched him eagerly, but he interrupted him just as Steve moved his hand down to his hole.

“Hang on, hang on,” he said. He twisted his body a little bit and stuck an arm down between the head of the bed and the wall. After a second, he came back up with a small clear bottle. Steve raised his eyebrows at him. “Hey, you’re not the only one who has been finishing himself off every night,” Bucky said, smirking at Steve, who immediately looked mortified. Bucky laughed. “Don’t be embarrassed, punk. I’ve got super ears, remember? Besides,” he said, smiling, “your little noises made my work over here a lot easier.” Steve still felt his face flush, but caught the bottle of lube Bucky tossed his way.

He slathered a few fingers in it, ready to open Bucky up for himself. Bucky had made his work a little easier, and one finger slid in without resistance at all. Bucky shuddered at his touch. He had barely begun to move his finger inside him when Bucky moaned, “More, Stevie.”

“You got it,” Steve said in a low voice. He slid a second, then a third finger inside Bucky. It sounded like he knocked the breath out of him, so Steve didn’t move his hand until Bucky let out a whine. Smirking again, he started to gently move his fingers, wriggling to try to find his prostate. Bucky’s long string of curses let him know when he apparently hit it. Steve relished the way Bucky was tight around his fingers, and it made his cock throb thinking about what Bucky might feel like around it. He removed one finger and used the remaining two scissor Bucky’s hole open a little wider, eager to have him as open as possible.

“Steve,” Bucky said in a low moan, “fuck me.”

The command was simple, but it sent a shiver down Steve’s spine. Hearing Bucky say it out loud was better than he ever imagined in his desperate late night solo sessions.

He let go of Bucky’s leg and used his free hand to slather some lube onto his impatient cock, shuffling a little while still fingering Bucky to reach it. He pulled himself up onto his knees, keeping up his efforts to open Bucky, who was definitely wide enough for him now. The sight of Bucky, red-faced and hole slick and open drove a wave a lust to his brain and his hard cock.

He pulled his fingers out of Bucky slowly and lowered himself a bit to place his head at Bucky’s entrance, one hand on himself and the other softly caressing Bucky’s thigh. The moment they touched, they let out matching groans, both positively aching for the other. Steve was nearly panting, every impulse, every nerve urging him to push forward and feel Bucky around him. But, with Herculean effort, he steadied himself and grabbed onto Bucky’s thigh with sudden urgency. “Buck,” he breathed, locking eyes with him, “are you sure? I really don’t want to rush you into something, and I promise I can wait, if that’s what you want.”

Bucky, not tearing his eyes from Steve’s, smiled softly. “Never been so sure about anything in my life,” he said, voice full of purpose. Steve, affection washing through his lustful brain, leaned down and kissed him hard. After a while, Bucky pulled back, resting his forehead against Steve’s and looking him in the eye. “You gonna fuck me or what, pal?” Steve almost snorted, leaving Bucky with one quick bite on his bottom lip before pushing himself back onto his knees, angling Bucky’s knees toward his own chest, placing himself at Bucky’s entrance, and pushing in slowly.

The second his head was inside Bucky, Steve was sure he was going to die on the spot. Bucky’s warmth surrounding him, the way he watched Bucky’s eyes rolls back in pleasure, he couldn’t imagine life could ever get better than this moment. That is, until Bucky moaned out something that sounded like more, and Steve pushed another inch of himself inside him, and, wait, no, now he was going to die.

Steve moved gingerly, despite Bucky’s rather desperate moans for more, god, more, not wanting to hurt Bucky. It occurred to him somehow, through the bliss of feeling Bucky tight around his cock, that he had absolutely no idea if this was the first time Bucky had done this, and oh god should he have worn protection, and can Super Soldiers even get STIs, and maybe he shouldn’t have rushed Bucky at all, when Bucky’s voice cut through his racing brain. “You okay?” he asked nervously, and Steve snapped out of it to find Bucky’s face concerned where it had just been full of pleasure.

“Oh my god, yes, Buck,’ Steve said quickly. “Just got in my own head for a second, sorry.” He gave him a sheepish smile, which Bucky returned as a smirk.

“Well, not that I wouldn’t love to have long, ponderous conversation with you about that, but your cock is only halfway inside me right now, and I don’t think you are going to be able to keep your promise to fuck me senseless with it like that,” Bucky said, smirk growing.

“Unbelievable,” Steve muttered under his breath, and just because he knew it would wipe off that smug smirk, he slid the rest of himself into Bucky, firmly but not too fast, still a little worried about hurting him. He was right about the smirk, though; it was replaced on Bucky’s face with something that could have been pain, but, based on the noise he was making, Steve suspected was total and complete pleasure. Satisfied by having shut Bucky up for a second, Steve allowed himself to focus on his own pleasure.

The feeling of being all the way inside Bucky, completely surrounded by him, was incomparable. Whatever Steve thought was good about sex before was gone, completely gone, because this was now the pinnacle. Nothing, he thought, could ever feel as good as Bucky, tight and warm around him. If his super lungs were frustrating him earlier, he couldn’t remember, because in this moment all he could do was thank Erskine’s ghost for giving him the ability to do this without falling into an asthmatic fit. (He hoped Erskine wasn’t too scandalized from beyond the grave at the context of the thank you.)

“Stevie,” Bucky shuddered, “that feels so good.” His breath was hitching, obviously adjusting to having Steve all the way inside him. Steve was overcome by the view of Bucky, legs curled up into himself, cock still hard and flushed, mouthed pulled into an O of pleasure. He folded himself down off his knees, pressing his mouth to Bucky’s, adjusting his angle slightly with the movement and somehow sliding deeper still into him. Bucky’s breathed hitched again, gasping a little into Steve’s kiss.

Steve pulled back and pressed his forehead against Bucky’s. “Tell me what you want, baby,” he whispered, feeling daring again. Bucky gave a little half moan, obviously turned on by either the nickname or the command, or maybe both.

“Fuck me,” he breathed. “Please,” he added, winking.

Steve smirked, and that was all the direction he needed before he started shifting his hips, pumping slowly at first. Every time he moved even slightly within Bucky, he thought he might come just from the pure ecstasy of knowing that it was real, that he was finally getting to be with Bucky like this. Soon, however, his animal need took over.

“Fuck, fuck, shit, fuck, Steve,” Bucky was moaning, and the sound of it was driving Steve out of his head. He started thrusting faster and a little bit harder than he intended. But the sound of his skin against Bucky’s, Bucky’s curse-moans, and his own involuntarily noises of pleasure were winning out over any logical part of his brain that had been telling him to take it slow. He hoped he wasn’t putting too much strain on Bucky by nearly folding him in half, but he needed to keep his face hovering over Bucky’s while he fucked him because the need to kiss him washed over him every other second. When he couldn’t reach Bucky’s mouth, he settled for his neck, his shoulder, or his hand, when Bucky reached his arm up to Steve’s face.

He shifted himself slightly, adjusting his angle, and was thrilled by Bucky letting out the most undignified yelp he had ever heard him make. His eyebrows shot directly to his hairline, and he started to chuckle a little. “Oh yeah?” he asked, staring cheekily down at Bucky.

Bucky looked like he wanted to retort, to tell Steve off for laughing at him, but Steve gave another little experimental thrust from that angle and he could almost see the breath being knocked out of him. Bucky was silent, the ghost of a moan he did not have the air in his lungs for on his lips, and Steve knew he had found his spot. He resumed his previous pace, hard and fast, aching to keep Bucky playing on the edge of silent pleasure for as long as he could last—and also hopefully for the rest of their lives.

Bucky writhed underneath him, seemingly overstimulated, but when Steve started to slow down he nearly growled. “Don’t you fucking dare, Rogers,” he snarled. Steve smirked again and picked his pace back up. He watched hungrily as Bucky reached for the bottle of lube abandoned beside them and squeezed some into his palm. Bucky started working his cock in time with Steve’s thrust, and the sight of it was almost too much. Steve had been close before, overwhelmed by Bucky’s tightness and the fulfillment of his long-held fantasy, but seeing Bucky start to pleasure himself was definitely going to send him over the edge.

“Fuck,” Steve grunted under his breath as he continued his fast pace. Bucky hummed in agreement and started to pump his hand faster. Something inside Steve snapped into place, and he realized there was no way in hell he was going to let Bucky be the one to finish himself off. What’s the point of super strength if you can’t hold yourself up on one hand while you work a cock with the other? He reached down greedily and surprised Bucky, who had closed his eyes for a moment. “Please, let me,” Steve said, his tone coming out as more of a beg than he intended. Bucky let go, his mouth setting into another pleasured O as Steve wrapped his large hand around him.

Steve liked the dual rhythms of his hand and his hips, liked being in charge of Bucky feeling good at both points of pleasure. Sooner than he expected, Bucky was sputtering a little, trying to warn Steve about his imminent climax but unable to find the breath. Steve thrusted and pulled him through it and was surprised at how much he relished the feeling of Bucky’s cum on his hand. Bucky, who had let out a loud string of curses as the wave of his orgasm hit him, went silent when he saw Steve bring his messy hand to his mouth and lick off his cum. Steve liked the taste but liked more Bucky’s hungry gaze as he watched him do it. Steve felt his hips shudder at the sight of it, and he knew his own climax was right there.

“Buck, I’m close,” Steve said in a low voice. He started to pull out, ready to finish himself off in his hand like he was used to, but Bucky gripped at his back.

“I want you to come in me,” he commanded, voice low and serious. The sound of it sent goosebumps through Steve’s skin, and his thrusts became harder and faster. He settled his face into the crook of Bucky’s neck as he panted hard, knowing any second the crest of the wave would hit him. Bucky wrapped his legs around Steve’s waist and dug his nails into Steve’s back just so, and that was it for Steve. His orgasm hit him like a brick wall, knocking the air out of his lungs. His whole body shuddered, and he had a hard time supporting his weight and not falling completely on top of Bucky. He felt himself spill into Bucky’s warmth, and the pleasure of that sensation itself would be enough to get him hard for probably years to come.

His arms started to shake a little, his body still reeling from pleasure he was pretty certain he had genuinely never felt before, and he heard small laughter coming from underneath him. “Lay down, Stevie,” he said quietly, and Steve happily obliged, collapsing ungracefully on top of Bucky. His cock was still twitching inside Bucky, so he groaned a little when Bucky shifted out from under him and off of his cock. Bucky laughed, pulling his body flush with Steve’s so that Steve was on his stomach and Bucky was cradling his side. He began rubbing circles into Steve’s back with as light of a touch as his metal arm could provide. The cool feeling of it on his sweaty bare skin gave Steve goosebumps again.

“So,” Bucky breathed into Steve’s ear as he continued trying to catch his breath, “I’d say that was worth the wait, right?”

Steve laughed into the pillow he was face-first in. “Yeah,” he said, voice muffled, “definitely worth the wait.” He managed to use his still recuperating body to flip and face Bucky, sticking a thigh in between his and pulling Bucky close, sliding one arm beneath him to put both hands on his ass and give it a squeeze. “That was better than I ever imagined, actually,” he admitted. Bucky smiled a little dopily and leaned in to kiss him tenderly. When the kiss broke, Bucky snuggled closer to Steve, resting his head in the crook of his neck as Steve wrapped his arms around his waist tightly, happy to stay that way forever.

After a few minutes of contented silence, Bucky murmured into Steve’s neck, “It was a little different than I imagined, too, actually.”

Steve shook his head a little, sensing Bucky’s teasing tone even before it appeared. “Oh yeah?” he said. “How did you picture it?”

“Usually from behind,” he said, and Steve could practically hear the shit-eating grin on his face.

Steve barked a laugh and then nuzzled his face into the top of Bucky’s head, kissing his hair lightly. “I’ll see what I can do about that next time,” he said softly, fully out of steam to tease Bucky back. They lay that way, naked and sweaty and tangled up in each other, for what felt like hours.

Eventually, despite Bucky’s rather serious threats of bodily harm to him if he moved a muscle, Steve extricated himself from the tangle of Bucky’s limbs to grab some water and a damp washcloth to clean them off. Bucky lay limp and unmoving as Steve tried to wipe in between his legs, and it was both infuriating and charming. He threw the used cloth into Bucky’s face, who yelped in disgust and batted it back in his direction.

Steve, laughing, scurried to the edge of the room and flipped off Bucky’s light, which he felt like he was silently complaining about being on eons ago, instead of the mere hours it actually had been.

But that’s how his brain seemed like it was going to shape his life from now on, he thought as he wandered back to Bucky’s bed, collapsing half on top of him, using as little of the huge expanse of the mattress as possible so that he could be as close to Bucky’s naked form as he could. It seemed to Steve that life was now Before Sex With Bucky and After Sex With Bucky—a moment so important that he would measure his life around it, at least privately in his head anyway.

“Buck?” Steve whispered into the dark.

“Mmmph?” came a vague noise from Bucky’s sleepy face, pressed to Steve’s collarbone.

“You awake down there?” he asked.

“Sure, I guess I am now,” he said, sighing uncharacteristically dreamily onto Steve’s skin.

Steve pressed a kiss to the top of Bucky’s head. “Just wanted to say,” he began, “I meant what I said earlier about knowing I’m never gonna feel differently about you.”

Bucky snorted a little. “Okay,” he said quietly, “and you just wanted to wake me up to repeat yourself, or?”

Steve grinned mischievously because he knew Bucky couldn’t see. “No,” he said, “wanted to wake you up to say that it goes double now because I know what fucking you is like. Nobody in his right mind would give that up.”

Bucky groaned and nipped at Steve’s collarbone in protest. “You’re a real piece of work, Rogers, you know that?” Steve laughed heartily and nuzzled his face into Bucky’s hair. “But, hey, while we’re at it,” Bucky continued, “I won’t be giving up that dumb mouth of yours any time soon, either.”

Steve flushed a little but laughed. Bucky tilted his head up, lips pursed and eyes shut, and Steve kissed him softly. He pulled back ever so slightly so that he could just make out Bucky’s eyes fluttering open in the dark. “I love you, baby.”

Bucky practically purred, the new nickname still having a physical effect on him. He nuzzled his face back into Steve’s neck, where he placed a few more light kisses. “I love you, too,” he said.

Sleep came easily to both of them, and, to Steve's absolute delight, so did a repeat roll in the hay the next morning. And afternoon. And evening. And, well, almost every free moment they had until someone else came back to HQ. They both agreed Super Soldier stamina was good for something after all.

**Author's Note:**

> eep, this started in my head as not smut and then....it just sort of became smut. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ (do people even still say smut?) this title is rather uncleverly just the name of a walk the moon song, which is good and about sex lol. oh, and the playlist i had in mind here would probably just be a lot of [Charles Bradley](https://open.spotify.com/artist/462T0buQ5ScBUQCRpodDRf), who is wonderful. 
> 
> thanks so much for reading; hope you enjoyed! i always love to hear from you via comments and kudos of course. :) come hang out with me on [tumblr,](http://theforestagain.tumblr.com/) where things are much safer for work.


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